Tuesday, December 29, 2015

Word of the year and other stuff

My assignment for this week from my writing coach is to make a blog post.
Yes, I have a writing coach because I want to write, photograph, and publish a photo book.
Judging by my commitment to this blog, and inability to stay consistent, I am not doing all that well.
I even stopped writing in my journal.

I am trying to find my voice.
I am trying to find defenses against people (readers) who might not get my writing voice.
I have a self-deprecating sense of humor, I don't follow any trends, I've never been cool, and I have an opinion that's not always the best one.
I have a problem presenting myself as an expert when I am not one.
Many bloggers either present themselves as experts or get assigned that label, and it's not true, and it puts a lot of pressure on people.
I am a person who likes to change her mind, but I don't think people would be OK with that.
I am a person who admires positive thinking, and positive intentions, but I also like to say that they don't always work, and that thinking positive is one thing, but getting sh*t done is another.

For some reason I am worried about what people will think and being misunderstood, and I know I will not have the time to answer comments that might be negative.
I know there is a way to monitor comments, yet I have a full time job that I am trying to leave, so I don't have time for all that comment moderation.

As with every new year, and every new beginning, my intentions are to be organized and prepared.
I can't promise myself or anyone else that those intentions will be fulfilled.  What I can promise (sort of) is that I will write down my ideas, and then I will write blog posts about them.  I will write as me, and if someone finds it offensive, I will explain or clarify, but if they still have a problem with it, both of us ill need to move on and move forward.

My word for 2016 is freedom.  
There are some invisible chains that I wear and worries that are not mine, and I need to free my mind, spirit and soul from them.
There are obligations that I never asked for and fulfilling them will break me, and some of them I'll allow to break me, the rest I need freedom from.

I will do the best I can, but I will also keep looking at this quote my friend sent me, because she knows me well

"You either try or you don't.  If you try, you can talk about it.  If you don't try, stay silent."

Here is to me and this blog not staying quite for too long, and for me finding and creating my freedom in 2016.

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