I am in over my head.
Goals, goals, goals.
Dreams, dreams, dreams.
Plans, plans, plans.
I am feeling a shift from dreaming to doing.
I am feeling a shift from I can't to I'll give it my best shot.
I was working on Unraveling The Year Ahead 2015 workbook (find it at www.susannahconway.com) and I came to realize that 2014 was a good year.
As much as I wanted to make it bad and miserable (I don't know why, I think the last couple weeks have been rough) 2014 has been good.
One of the prompts is what stands out the most from 2014?
Here is what I wrote:
No one moment stands out the most, what stands out is that this has been a good year, despite of what I'd like to think and say. It has been a good year because I think it has shown me where it is I want to go, and as much as I think how easy something can be, I need to do the work within, I need to get myself to where I want to go emotionally. Being raw, and crazy, and crying all the time is not easy, but it feels cleansing and opening. 2014 has been a good year."
I think I can even say it's been a GREAT year.
My word for 2014 was SOLID and I hate that word right now, however, my family has been SOLID in helping me, and sticking by me. My friends have been SOLID in embracing my ideas, and holding me while I fall apart. My brother has been SOLID in lifting me up when I opened up to him. Maybe SOLID wasn't about me, it was about all the folks around me.
As I feel the blessings around me, and as I fight tears almost every day because something or someone touches me (worse than when I was pregnant) I am learning, and feeling love. I am allowing. I am accepting.
Where are you in your heart/mind/sprit as 2014 draws to a close? Do you feel you get a clean slate with the New Year, or will you gently continue into it? Please share, I am curious.